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GENERAL IDEAS THAT WORK FOR US
Household ideas to keep your Loved Ones Safe
Treat the house as if a toddler lives there
Eliminate knickknacks and anything that might make the Dementia patient feel anxious.
This means to DE-Clutter. The clutter makes their minds feel busy.
Keep detergents in a safe place.
Give them a place to go to calm down when they feel angry.
Place a calendar in an open area. Cross off each day as it ends.
Write down their address and contacts on a small index card. Put it in their wallet.
Let neighbors know if they see your loved one wondering to call you.
Contact the local police with an updated photo of your loved one. Let them know the diagnosis and your contact information.
Keep visitors to a minimum and don't have loud noises in the house.
Lock doors and windows and let them know you are securing the house for their safety.
We purchased a lanyard similar to a dog tag for service people with his name and address for him to wear in case he gets lost.
We also purchased a bracelet that does not come off with his name and my cell number on it
What type of identification should we use for a dementia person?
create a business-style card with a brief message
"Be patient with u, my Dad has Dementia"
When your loved ones are upset
Change topics
Divert the mood
Fo my dad, when is upset with himself, I make the house quiet
We play calming music or 50’s music on the Alexa
And chill/ relax
Sometimes I put the timer on when he keeps telling me how horrible he is
He can’t talk until the timer goes off
Sometimes I hold his hand- His breathing slows-His mood relaxes
His heart rate slows
And he usually smiles at me because I say
No talking until the timer dings
We try not to talk about him in front of him. We use the name 'George' when we discuss his needs . He doesn't like us to talk about him
SHOWERING or Daily Activities- Reluctant to shower ideas
Some days my dad doesn't want to do anything. He says, "later, later, not now."
It is draining for me and I need him to shower or change his underwear (diaper).
I set a minute timer. Some days, I set it for 20 minutes. I put it in front of him. When it goes off, he has to get the shower or whatever else we agree for him to do. Some days, I write the chore on an index card and set the time. When the timer goes off, he reads the index card and completes the task. This works!
Don't set the timer for too long.
If he says his clothes are clean but he has had them on for days. I take a picture of us. The next day, I say let's change. He says he already did (but didn't). I show him the picture and tell him that I am in new clothes and now he has to change.
Tips for dressing
-before you put on his pants
put his socks on
it makes it easier to pull the pants up so the toes don't grip the pants
- put the belt on the pants before you put the pants on
-have dad sit down the put his shirt and socks on
put pulls ups on than pants, have him stand and pull each one up
so he only stands up once
-use a shoe horn so you don't have to untie the sneakers and tie them
Showering is our biggest challenge. I tell him we are going out or the nurse is visiting us and we must get cleaned up. I go with him into the bathroom. I put a clean diaper (we say underwear so he doesn't feel bad and we use gray so they look like underwear) on the counter, and his clean clothes on a hanger on the back of the door. He can identify the clothes are clean because they are on the hanger. I leave a hankey and clean socks on the counter. I take everything out of the bathroom to prevent distractions. I have him brush his teeth and shave. I put the shaving cream on his hands and direct him to spread it on his face. I hand him the razor. Most days he can shave if not I do it. Then, I say, " give me your shirt, empty your pockets into the clear, small cup, give me your sneakers and socks, give me your belt." Then, I step into the hallway and say, "give me your pants."
While I am in the hallway and say, Dad, take off your underwear and enter the shower. Turn it on and get in. He is able to shower. These simple steps help so he doesn't put back on dirty clothes or a dirty diaper. While he is in the shower, I grab the diaper.
We put baby locks on all the bathroom drawers and cabinets to prevent distractions and so he doesn't cut himself with anything.
Doing wash and household jobs
I try to make my dad feel important and useful. I have him help me unload the dishwasher, fold clothes, and put them away. He helps me strip beds and makes the beds. He likes to fold the towels and put them away. I tried something new this week. I had him help me iron his clothes with the steamer. He enjoyed it. It took about 30 minutes. I kept an eye on him. It helps to make him feel independent.
Sorting objects Of interest such as baseball cards, old coins, and pictures.
we chose to sort coins. I found old coins and new coins. We used a magnifying glass to check the dates, values, and country of origin. We sorted them into small baskets. Then we looked on a map to locate some of the countries. We spend about an hour doing this. This is my dad’s favorite activity. On a funny note, he wanted to keep all of the coins. I didn’t want to upset him so I let him keep them.
We also sorted baseball cards by team. He enjoyed it but the words on the cards can be a distraction.
My parents used to live in the Ft. Myers Florida area near lots of seashells. They have a huge collection of rare and unique shells. We sort them and search for the name of the shells using a shell poster.
Luncheon for Men's Club
My dad doesn't remember friends or most of the family. He is surrounded by 3 daughters and wishes to be at work with the men (he was a carpenter).
I am planning a MEN'S LUNCH this Saturday. I invited his son, 2 sons-in-law,s and 3 grandsons. He might not recognize them but he will be happy to be with the BOYS.
We planned the menu. He wants hoagies, chips, and beer. We planned 3 activities: ride the golf cart, hit golf balls, and throw horseshoes. He is so excited. Now, we are working on invitations and signs. He is coloring the signs and repeating the information about the lunch. He is so happy.
I took copy paper, crayons, and markers. Wrote out the information
Men's Lunch
Members Only
Saturday at 1:00 pm
He added color and designs to each sign. This was a hands-on activity that was definitely
He made invitations on paper and we delivered them.
Hands-on Activity to complete together-BIRD HOUSE Hands-on activities to make and use with my father to help keep the day going in a positive direction. We completed 2 birdhouses so far. We customized them to give as gifts.
Day 1
First, we opened the box and looked at all of the pieces. we organized the pieces and put similar parts/ pieces together. everything we need to complete the project was in the box including the glue.
Day 2
We nailed the sides together and glued the edges together. We let it sit off to the side to dry.
We took the many small pieces for the shingle roof and put them together by size.
Day 3
Glued the shingles onto the roof and allowed pieces to dry.
Day 4
We took some old 'Scrabble letters and glued our last name and my daughter's last to the side of the birdhouse to give as a gift.
Took pictures and shared the good news of completing the birdhouse with our family.
Day 5
Placed the birdhouse above the television so everyone who visited could see our project and talk about it with my dad
There are lots of pieces with this birdhouse. My dad is a retired carpenter so he could handle it.
this was a fun project to complete together. It was complicated at times but the challenge and end result was worth the effort.
Please join me as I research and learn how to better care for my elderly parents with Dementia. https://www.facebook.com/groups/276568263823321/
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